Sunday, December 12, 2010

Philmore Pffiggins. Cloverdale's Newly Elected Mayor.


Philmore Pffiggins is the newly elected mayor of Cloverdale, having beat his opponent by twelve votes in last month’s elections. His opponent, and current mayor, disputed the election and claimed voting irregularities, but such is to be expected in a Cloverdale election. The Shire Elections Board reviewed the charges and found them unwarranted. Their ruling forgave the election judge in charge of the Polling Site at the Kicking Donkey Pub near the village’s train station.

In the ruling, the election board stated,
Regulations strictly forbid the consumption of alcohol by any one serving as an election judge. But considering this election station was located in a pub, and considering the judge at the station was Mrs. Liddy Lampke, a prominent citizen of the community and known to be able to hold her liquor, it is decided that the two pints she consumed during election day did not affect the voting at said location and therefore did not affect the outcome of the election.
The current mayor disagrees but decided not to pursue the matter fearing a reprisal from his landlady, who happens to be a member of Mrs. Liddy Lamke’s Gin and Tonic Club which meets at the Kicking Donkey on the second Tuesday of every month.

Mayor Elect Pffiggins owns the tailor shop located at the back of Beatrix Potter’s Pottery and Fine Porcelain Shop on the High Street in Cloverdale. His suits are know throughout the Shire for quality craftsmanship and unparalleled stitching. In fact, he is wearing one of his own creations in the photograph above, taken during one of his lunchtime constitutionals through the village. Mayor Pffiggins calls these walks “my meet and greets”. It is his way of connecting with the villagers and increasing his business traffic.

Mayor Elect Pffiggins will be sworn in on January 4th at the village library. He is promising a new suit for the occasion and rumor has it he has ordered a new hat from his suppliers in England. The swearing in ceremony may be something our readers will not want to miss.

The Mayor’s Ball and Bingo will be held that same evening in St. Bartholomew’s Social Hall. Tickets may be purchased at the Library, or from Miss Beatrix Potter. Miss Potter has graciously volunteered to help with ticket sales, considering Mayor Elect Pffiggins does not keep a cash register on his premises.

No comments:

Post a Comment