Saturday, January 1, 2011

Cloverleaks Brings You the Truth About Millstone Road, Cloverdale.

This Picture, taken of the Janklef Home before it was torn down, was leaked to Cloverleaks from a source
within the Ministry of Truth, Education and Propaganda.

A Posting from Cloverleaks.
Releasing the Truth, the Whole Truth and Nothing But the Truth

We find the leaks before “They” plug them up.

Two weeks ago something happened at 4:32 A.M. on Millstone Road, Cloverdale that woke the entire neighborhood.

“It drew me straight out of bed to see what was the matter,” said one elderly neighbor who asked not be identified.
“It had the sound of a muffled explosion,” said another woman, again not wanting to be identified. “But we aren’t suppose to talk about it so I’d better hush up before someone finds out.”

The woman was correct. Within one hour of the incident helicopters arrived and what looked like SWAT officers from Capital City closed the entire street and evacuated the neighborhood. Everyone was taken to the Comprehensive School’s theater and introduced to the Minister of Truth, Education and Propaganda (Minitruth). He spent the next twenty minutes explaining the National Secret’s Act and how what happened on Millstone Road fell within the Act’s prerogative. The penalties for ‘talking’ could be severe.

The Minister thanked them for their attention and turned the microphone over to a gentleman wearing a National Gas Board tradesman’s uniform. He gave the audience a speech with power point presentation on the dangers of natural gas.

“It is our belief that what happened on your street was a natural gas explosion caused by the build up of gas under the home in question,” he said as he wrapped up his remarks. “The National Gas Board takes full responsibility and will compensate each of you for any damage caused by the explosion.”

An unidentified man stood up in the darkened hall and raised his hand to speak. “Sir, that was no gas explosion. Did you see the house? I was more of an implosion!”

The room went quiet. The house lights immediately brightened. Two men wearing dark suits and ear pieces converged on the man’s row - each coming from a different direction to cut off any possible escape. The woman sitting next to the man screamed. The man tried to escape by crawling over the people in front of him but was captured before he could do so and dragged out of the hall.

The room was quiet again. Everyone’s eyes focused on the government minister. He looked surprised and perhaps frightened. He cleared his throat and urged the officer from the Gas Board to continue by waving his hand forward.

The gentleman at the microphone continued, his voice wavered showing a level of stress that wasnt’ there before. “As I said, it was a natural gas explosion.”

Mrs. Janklef. Missing.

A woman stood and spoke. Her voice was firm, showing no sign of fear. “That home belonged to Mildred Janklef. I don’t see her here. Is she alright? Was she injured?”

Two more men in suits started moving toward the woman’s row but stopped when the Minister held out his hand and motioned them back into their corners. The Minister took the microphone. “Mrs. Janklef has been taken to Captial City for treatment. There will be no further questions.”

With that the meeting ended. The villagers were taken back to their neighborhood by bus. When they arrived they saw that Janklef home had been torn down. Bulldozers were finishing up the work. Dump trucks were busy going back and forth taking away the debris. Bright yellow police tape surrounded the yard with signs from the Ministry posted at every corner reminding everyone of the National Secrets Act.

The Posters Reminding the residents of Millstone Road of the National Secrets Act.

Today, only those living on Millstone Road are allowed to enter that neighborhood. Police have checkpoints at both entrances and check everyone’s identification before they are allowed to pass. A large plastic bubble covers the place where Mrs. Janklef once lived. People from the Ministry of Science and Industry work in the bubble morning, noon and night. No one can see what they are doing, and because of the signs posted everywhere are too afraid to ask.

Cloverleaks is demanding an explanation. Cloverleaks wants to know what happened on that quiet street two weeks ago. Cloverleaks wants to know what happened to Mrs. Janklef. A check of all hospitals in the Confederacy failed to turn her up. She has effectively disappeared off the face of the planet.

Cloverleaks is defying the National Security Act by bringing this to your attention. Our purpose is to inform only. What you do with this information is strictly up to you.

Thursday, December 30, 2010

Cloverdale's Operatic Society Attends the Theater

Edna Epstein is the President and lead Soprano of Cloverdale’s Operatic Society which meets twice each month at 7:00 P.M. in the Comprehensive School’s theater. She is currently with other members of the society on a two day holiday at the Grand Imperial Hotel in Capital City. She and her husband Edmond are sharing a room with their loved and overly pampered dog, Trixie.

Members of Cloverdale's Operatic Society Preparing for This Year's Production of Snow White

Tonight, the National Opera and Symphony are performing Bach’s St. Matthew’s Passion at the National Theater. It will be carried live on Cloverdale Weekend Television. Two months ago, while rehearsing for their next performance of Snow White (a New Year’s favorite for many in the village and surrounding areas), Doris Dale suggested that the entire Operatic Society attend the performance at the National Theater . Everyone happily agreed and praised Doris for the idea. Doris is the Society’s activities chairwoman and amazes everyone with her suggestions. She claims she is a party animal at heart, although one wouldn’t know that, considering she is rarely seen outside of her modest one bedroom bungalow - except at the Piggly Wiggly for groceries and occasionally at the Kicking Donkey for a gin and tonic. Of course she never misses the Operatic Society. Doris explained that a two day excursion with a nice stay at the Grand Imperial would be the perfect way to top off this year’s holiday season. A round of, “Here Here’s” was shouted across the stage when she finished. Doris blushed and waved the attention away.

The performance was due to start in less than forty minutes. Edna was dressed but kept the rest of the Society waiting in the hotel's lobby while she finished Trixie’s walk on a treadmill supplied in the Hotel's Fitness Room. Trixie would normally walk outside but Edna thought the recent cold might chill her lungs. Edna feared Trixie would catch a cold, and if she did, her snoring and snorting would be magnified. On her bad nights, Trixie has been known to wake the neighbors. Earlier that evening of the Hotel’s porters was kind enough to briefly step outside with her long enough so Trixie could do her business. Edna tipped him generously, took the leash, and walked her pug to the waiting tread mill.

Edna looked at her watch, saw the time and stopped the machine. It was time to collect her husband and the other members of the Society. Edna left Trixie with the kind attendant at the front desk who promised Trixie would enjoy her brief stay in the hotel’s kennel. She assured Edna that only the finest pedigrees were in residence that evening. Edna thanked her for understanding Trixie’s uniqueness.

"Let's be off then," Edna shouted while waving her gloved right hand around in the air as if swatting away a bee. Cloverdale’s Operatic Society followed in a single file line through the hotel’s large brass revolving doors and out into the cold night for the short walk to the National Theater. Doris made a point to be last out. The smile which emerged from her heavily madeup face, reflected the pride she took in knowing their cultural evening was her suggestion. She didn't have the best voice (classified as a scratchy alto) but she did know how to entertain.

Opening to Bach's St. Matthew Passion

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Timothy Trinkett Finds Clothing Confusing. The Story of an Apparel Handicap.

Timothy Trinkett lives with his mother, father, brother, four sisters, maiden aunt and two parakeets in the River Way Apartments in Cloverdale. He is an average student at Confederacy Primary School and does his best to stay out of the way, out of sight and therefore, out of mind.

Proper clothing has been the trial of Timothy’s young life. What to wear, at what time and in what combinations confuse the young boy. Therefore, his way of coping with his apparel handicap is to ignore it and wear whatever he fancies. Matching isn’t a concern, colors are beyond his ability to coordinate and seasonal dressing is only something he’s now beginning to understand.

His mother has grown tired of laying out his clothing day after day, only to have him change what she selected for things he believes are more practical. Take today for instance. Timothy wanted to go outside on this cold winter day in Cloverdale and watch ice float down the Clover River. He knew the river bank would be muddy, and he knew from past experience that mud is both slippery and messy. His way of dealing with the slipperiness and muddiness of mud was to wear one yellow wellington on one foot for the mess of mud and a hiking shoe with deep tread on the other for traction - appearance be damned.

His choice of clothing was both a frustration and a relief to his mother. Notice the sweater. That was her victory. Timothy has developed enough common sense to recognize the need for something warmer than a t-shirt for cold days. It only took eleven years for his common sense to surface - but there it was in its infancy.

Timothy’s apparel failure for the day was his shorts. Because of the potential for mud and mess, Timothy reasoned shorts would be his best choice for an outing near the river. After all, shorts used less material than a pair of trousers and therefore offered better protection from mud. A washrag would quickly take care of mud on the leg whereas the washing machine would be required for muddy pants. The reasoning was sound to Timothy, just not to anyone else.

Timothy went to the river and enjoyed watching the season’s first ice form along the banks. He didn’t stay out long due to the cold but even a few minutes out of the house was enough for Timothy. His sisters and maiden aunt are more than an eleven year old apparel handicapped boy can take.

Cloverdale Weekend Television. Sunday Weather and Songs of Praise. Blessed Assurance.

The Weather for Clovershire.
The fog that has blanketed the Shire for the past several days has lifted. Expect cold temperatures and bright sunshine throughout the day. Remember, Cloverdale's churches invite you to join them today in worship and urge you to take a moment to check on your elderly neighbors during these cold months of winter. Sometimes the old darlings forget to turn off their stoves and some may have forgotten how to set a proper fire.