Saturday, May 10, 2014

Abner Applegate

For the last forty-five years, Abner Applegate has reported on the village's downtown happenings for the shire's only newspaper, The Cloverdale Times.

Abner monitors the community's pulse from his favorite bench outside the village's Piggly Wiggly.  The bench sits next to the coin operated rocket ride and opposite the atomic gumball machine.  
"There isn't much that gets by old Abner," the store's manager was heard saying just the other day.

Abner appreciates news tips and leads.  He asks that they be written and deposited in the open satchel he keeps next to him on the bench. Please be mindful and don't wake him - if at all possible.  

Wednesday, May 7, 2014

Lucy Mayberry

     Lucy Mayberry is President of the Daughters of the Confederacy and the Chairwoman of the Spruce Street Neighborhood Watch Committee. What a good job she does! She sits on her porch day and night watching everyone and everything. "Nothing Gets by Lucy," is a phrase heard over and over again from Lucy's neighbors.
     She is also know for her delicious Twice Baked Brownies.
     Lucy is considering a run for the village school board and would appreciate any and all donations to her candidacy.
     "I'm running against Titus Miller, and you know what kind of money that man has stashed away," Lucy said at a gathering of her supporters in her front parlor Tuesday last.  Her Twice Baked Brownies were the main attraction, her politicking was secondary.  She was fortunate enough to raise enough cash to fund a  few hundred flyers to be distributed at the village tulip festival next week.
     Lucy is looking for someone familiar with the internet to help her get a Facebook.  She'd like to get lots of 'likes', although she is the first to confess she hasn't a clue what a 'like' is.       Be sure to stop by Lucy's booth at the tulip festival, sample a Twice Baked Brownie, and drop a few coins in the "Lucy for School Board" can.