The International Train Station at Fernwood on the Moor had a problem with crowds pushing forward to get the best seats on The Coastal Express. The Station Master knew it was a matter of time before someone got hurt. He ordered the placement of new signs along the platform. His new approach did the trick by adding a touch of humor to the warning. Problems with platform encroachment have declined significantly. Just another example of creative thinking here in The Confederacy of Dunces.