Thursday, January 29, 2009

The New Salvation Army Thrift Store on the High Street

The New Salvation Army Thrift Store and Ragtime Band

Cloverdale in the Shire’s Salvation Army is opening their new Thrift Store on the High Street. They wish to thank the citizen’s of Cloverdale and Dibley in the Downs for their generous contributions of nearly new, not so new, barely new, and laughably new donations of clothing, furnishings, appliances and electronics.

The Salvation Army Ragtime Band played Christian hits from the 1920's all day long as they welcomed the steady stream of cars and wagons bringing donations to the Thrift Store. Each donor was thanked in song and given a piece of donated, nearly new day old, cake from the Red Owl Grocery Store’s Bakery.

“I’m so glad they are here,” said Martha Wantnot as she arrived with two UHauls full of items and an unwelcomed pick up truck full of cheering neighbors. She was accompanied by the city's Fire Marshall. “My home was nearly condemned as a fire trap by the Fire Marshall because of my collections. I just can’t throw anything away bless my soul. The Good Book says ‘Waste Not, Want Not’ and I take my scriptures seriously. It’s obvious they don’t, ” she added while pointing to her ecstatic neighbors. On her way to help unload her collections she was seen stooping over to pick up a plastic fork. It went promptly into her purse.

“Yes, I’m happy we have a Thrift Store in Cloverdale,” said Derman Donaldson of Donaldson’s Department Store and President of the local Chamber of Commerce. “Donaldson’s wants to contribute to the poor and needy any way we can, while at the same time, remembering that the Lord helps those who help themselves. Why just look at the handicapped over there sorting the clothing we donated. Where else could people like that work and feel some sense of success no matter how insignificant? Working here for the Salvationists takes them off the welfare roles and isn't that the true purpose of religion? Bless the Salvationist's hearts for the good they'll do in our community,” he added as he pocketed his ‘in kind’ tax receipt from General Isaiah Junkell, General of the local Salvation Army. “Besides the town dump won’t take most of this junk anymore,” he was heard to mumble under his breath as he climbed into his Rolls Royce and sped away nearly running down a car greeter in a wheel chair.

General Junkell

General Junkell and his lovely wife Shirley encourage everyone to come down, visit the new store and buy a raffle ticket for a fantastic Grand Prize donated by Donaldson’s Department Store (See Picture Below). A brand new, never sold, once - state of the art video camera.

As Lord Mayor of Cloverdale in the Shire I want to welcome the new Salvation Army Thrift Store to our community.

A Once State of the Art Home Video Camera
The First Prize in the Salvation Army Raffle
Kindly Donated from the back of Donaldson's Warehouse

1 comment:

  1. I visited the new Salvation Army Thrift Store yesterday...interesting donations. I found 3 lovely red & 2 gold women's (styles from the 70's) blazers that will work nicely as
    Star Fleet admiral uniforms.
    Captain Kirk will approve!!!

    ReplyDelete