Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Lay Offs in Cloverdale! Miss Trudy Tressel's Report

Trudy Tressel, Cloverdale Villager Bookkeeper, Post Mistress and Part Time Traffic Warden

March 18, 2009

Sir Jeffrey Foxworth Sterling
Minister of Labor, Wages and Disputes
Capital City

Trudy Tressel
Cloverdale in the Shire City Office.
Bookkeeper, Post Mistress and Part Time Traffic Warden

Quarterly Unemployment Report

Dear Jeffrey,
With respect I submit my quarterly labor reports as required by regulations established by your Ministry.

I'm reporting layoffs in Cloverdale for this quarter. We hoped the recession the Outside World is experiencing wouldn't affect us, but sadly it is. Snelling Snow Removal Service reported the dismissal of its three shovellers last week. Lack of snow is the given reason. It is not surprising with the approaching Spring. We expect this every year. These layoffs bring Cloverdale’s quarterly numbers to five. The other two lay offs, if I may remind the Minister, were the result of another expected decline in Christmas baked good orders at Moss’s Wonderland Bakery.

I am happy to report that two of the dismissed shovellers found employment with the Shire Road Works. The department is preparing for new fair weather highway repair and construction. The third shoveller found work at GoodsPeeds Fishmongers. They are hiring for a busy summer fish season (yes, I remember your standing order for fresh oysters when I come to Capital City for training at month's end)

GoodsPeeds Fishmongers. The Fish Couldn't Be Fresher or the Service Friendlier.

Currently Cloverdale has four unemployed citizens. I called on them to determine their current status. It is my opinion they are waiting to look for work until their unemployment checks stop.

As required by regulation I certify this information is true and accurate and stamp my seal as village bookkeeper and notary public.

On an unrelated note, how is your daughter Wilma? We heard she was taken poorly several weeks ago. We are thinking of her and pray for a speedy recovery. My best to your wife as well.

On another unrelated note I want to thank you for your questions concerning my filing system. Your offer of a new computer to help me with my work if very kind but completely unnecessary. My system works well - so why change? Besides, if the machine breaks who in Cloverdale can fix it except for the boys at the Comprehensive School. Do you want me to trust a Shire computer to them?

Modern technology has its place but not in my office. I've got my account books at my fingertips, a good calculator, a reliable lamp and a push button dial phone. Honestly, what more do I need?

Shall we agree to leave that topic then.

Trudy Tressel

No comments:

Post a Comment