Marcell's New Glasses. Will You Include Your's on your Organ Donor Card?

Marcell Mist is a student blessed with new sight at Cloverdale's Middle School. Why the smile seen here in this picture, a smile not seen on Marcell's face for quite some time? Because Marcell is the recipient of a new pair of donated glasses through the Deceased Eyeglass Donor program.

The local government's Deceased Eyeglass Donor Program encourages the Cloverdale's residents to include their eyeglasses on their organ donor permission included on the back of all Clovershire's driver's licenses. So, along with their kidney's and hearts, citizens can donate their no longer needed eyeglasses to those in need. Why take a perfectly good pair of glasses to the grave when someone in your own neighborhood could benefit with their use?

"It is our opinion that eyeglasses will not be needed by those resurrected from the grave when the Lord returns," said the Most Reverend Bishop of the Cloverdale Parish. "I encourage everyone in the village to include your eyeglasses on your organ donor card."

Mr. George Gray

Marcel is the grateful recipient of Mr. George Gray's eyeglasses. George Gray passed away recently due to complications from minor electrocution caused through the use of a faulty defibrillator used to restore normal cardio rhythm during a costly root canal. The Gray children presented their father's eyeglasses to Marcell during a school assembly last Thursday. Marcell stumbled onto the stage because of poor eyesight and poor lighting but left the stage walking sure and steady with a new pair of glasses and clear vision.

"Its a miracle," shouted two students from the back of the auditorium. Each received two days of in school suspension for their flippant remark.

George Gray rests in peace knowing his donation helped a young boy live a richer and fuller life.

If you are interested in becoming an eyeglass donor, please check the organ and eyeglass donor box on the reverse side of your driving license.

Cloverdale's Mennonites, Today on Cloverdale Weekend Television

The Weather for Cloverdale and the Shire.

A sea of white throughout the Clover Valley envelopes the village and surrounding communities. Thick fog is expected throughout the day with a lifting perhaps as early as mid evening. Safe driving will be jeopardized with limited visibility. Colder than seasonal temperatures accompanies the fog making what some in the weather office are calling "a kind of day not even a strong cup of tea could brighten".

Cloverdale Weekend Television is proud to introduce Cloverdale's first Songs of Praise sponsored by the village's small but noticeable Mennonite congregation. The Mennonite's meet in the Albrecht home on Juniper Street every Sunday at 11:00 A.M. Each gathering is following by worshipful singing and coffee.

The congregation sent the following video and note to CWT :

We've noticed that your station airs religious broadcasting every Sunday morning. Our Cloverdale congregation would like to become part of that tradition by contributing a video to your Songs of Praise program. This video features our small fellowship gathered for morning coffee after service in our house church. Forgive the sound of the camera. Grandmother Willis was raised in the old ways and is unschooled on the proper use of the electronic device. She was elected to video because her voice, at one time beautiful, is now best used for the preaching of the word.

As a small congregation of believers, we want to thank the village for their support and acceptance. While we may dress differently, and at times have issue with certain forms of modernity, we are still Christians who make for good neighbors.

Cloverdale's Gamers Have a New Home

Until now Cloverdale's gaming population had two options if they wanted to purchase a new game. They could order one online and wait for delivery (and the Confederacy Post isn't known for promptness), or visit Donaldson's Department Store's small video game department next to the televisions and cell phones. The department store's electronics purchaser is 53 year old Eunice Planter. She is of the opinion that most video games are a waste of a young person's time. She is especially vigilant in her civic responsibilities and believes violent video games can twist young fragile and perceptive minds into acts of violence.

Acting on her opinions, Miss Planter stocks Donaldson's two video game shelves with educational games which teach basic math, grammar and spelling. Sales are virtually non existent so she makes up for the short sales in video games by offering good prices on all other electronics.

Mark Savage, Owner of Savage's Gaming in Cloverdale at a Recent Gaming Conference at Tamworth on Tide.

Today there is rejoicing in the darkened bedrooms of Cloverdale's male population. Savages's Gaming opened its doors yesterday. Owner Mark Savage, a decorated veteran of several online military campaigns, invites everyone, both young and old, to visit his new store for their gaming needs. In addition to all the latest games, Savage's offers a gaming room at the back of the store for online gaming. For a modest fee and slighter higher than normal prices for Coke products, you can leave reality and enter Savage's world.

Cloverdale's Chamber of Commerce welcomes this new addition to the village, found on Station Road.

Tulip, Dead at 20

Tulip, Waiting for her Creamed Beef and Sausage Supper.
Gone, but not Forgotten

News Flash
From the Confederacy Times
Cloverdale

Cloverdale's oldest dog is dead at the age of twenty. Tulip passed away this morning while enjoying a warm bath at the Nearly There Home for the Elderly and Confused. She was the only canine resident of the home, rescued form the animal shelter and adopted as a pup twenty years ago by the Home's head cook.
"Dogs weren't allowed at the Home back then and that policy is in effect even to this day, except of course for Tulip," said the Home's administrator Milo Mortimor. "The cook kept Tulip in the kitchen, but occasionally she'd escape and make her way to the resident's rooms. Of course, when your knocking on death's door, any company is most welcome, especially a loving - although ghastly looking dog."

Tulip became a fixture at the Home and was loved by everyone. Her passing came as shock to the residents, many of whom were immediately sedated to keep their blood pressure under control. Grief councilors were brought in to work with the parish priest from St. Bartholomew and the Pastor from Cloverdale's Saved by Grace Lutheran Church to console the grieving old age pensioners.

"It was suggested we have Tulip stuffed," said Cory Crump, an orderly at the Home responsible for spills and general clean up. "She was invaluable when it came to giving some of the old ducks their sponge baths. Some of these folks don't take kindly to water. Having Tulip on hand calmed them down. They'd pet her while I cleaned them up. If we have her stuffed, they can still hold and pet her thus making my job much easier."

Mr. Crump's suggestion, although logical, is not under consideration by the Home's administration.

Tulip was a loving, buzzard of a dog that made life easier for the many fine folks of Cloverdale. A memorial will be held in the Home's Common Room on Saturday right after morning Bingo and the Noon medications.

Puddles Suffers from Celebrity Depression.

Puddles lives at 96 Elm Street Cloverdale. Puddles was recently selected to appear as June's Dog of the Month in “The Dogs of Cloverdale Calendar for 2011". Puddles was selected after having been featured as November's centerfold in "BowWow", the bi monthly magazine for Clovershire's Dog Enthusiasts.

Puddle’s owner, Miss Tulip Trump, hasn’t had a moment's peace since the magazine and calendar hit the train station's newstand and the book shop.

“That phone is a constant nuisance,” Miss Tulip said in an interview for Cloverdale Weekend Television. “People call for Puddles at least once or twice each day. I surely understand the stress of stardom. It is a lonely life - for Puddles and me. We can't go anywhere without being recognized. The village children all want to rub their sticky little hand's through Puddle's fur. Before this, I had a happy friendly dog. Now, I'm dealing with Puddle's depression. It hurts me so to see a once lively and vivacious dog cut down so cruelly by fame.”

On advice from her lawyer, Miss Trump canceled Puddle’s breeding matches, leaving the dog unsatisfied and lonely.

“Puddles suffers from chronic depression brought upon by sudden stardom and loneliness. I’d like to honor the matches but my lawyer says to hold out for higher breeding fees because, well you know, Puddles is in high demand,” Miss Tulip explained. “This lack of fulfillment, mixed with constant grooming and other scheduled photo shoots has put Puddles into a nasty gloom. Just last week, Puddles ran out into the road and was nearly run over by the milkman. I think it was a cry for help, most attempted suicides are.”

Puddles snorted, as if in agreement. Miss Tulip wiped a tear from her eye.

Puddles is currently taking a course of tranquilizers and spends much of the day semi conscious on the sofa.

We hope for the best for Puddles and Miss Tulip.